Tuesday, November 16, 2004

Today Is Weird

  • Brought on, no doubt, by hours spent reading literary theory and studying for an exam in my Brit Lit class, I had a dream that James Joyce was a professor at my college who looked like the guy from Lord of the Rings who isn't Viggo or a Hobbit. Disappointingly, DreamJamesJoyce managed to be both dreadfully dull and dreadfully dumb, and his lecture on penis envy centered around a discussion of his neighbors. I don't know.

    This is what they mean when they say too much schoolwork is bad for the brain. And by "they", of course, I mean...me.

  • While walking down the block, I came across a couple and their baby who were having an argument.

    Man: You suck and swallow anything that come out that mothafucka!
    Babymama: What did you just say? Get your ass back here! You don't know what you're saying!
    Man: I am SICK of this! SICK of this!

    The man then stormed away, crossing the street without them. Babymama then left the baby on the other side of the street, ran after him, kicked him in the stomach, and then stopped traffic to run and get her baby.

    I think I speak for us all when I say that people scare me.

  • I had to call NASA at my internship to get information about one of the members of their Hall of Fame and the man on the other line informed me, rather apologetically, that he didn't have time to talk because he was just on the way out the door to get KFC.

    A simple "I'm on another call" would have done just fine, really.

  • On my way to get a Diet Coke, I saw two squirrels playing hide-and-seek in a pile of leaves, which was rather cute, but it seemed to be part of some sort of mating ritual as they began shagging on top of the leaves as I walked by.

  • I really want to take a nap, I feel like The Twilight Zone theme will be starting up any second, or that I'm on Candid Camera or something.

    Mallory at 11/16/2004 03:47:00 PM

    2comments

    2 Comments

    at 10:34 PM Blogger phoenix said...

    Sounds like today kinda sucked. I can sympathize although my "other people" experience was much better, helpful, even. I'm more in a "technology sucks" mood. I do hope you got a nap though. Mmm... naps are very good. Maybe I'll do that. I think I'll do that now.

     
    at 2:14 AM Blogger phoenix said...

    I love Sean Bean, but he'd have to be on an extra-terrestial level of hotness to transcend dreadfully dull and dumb James Joyce Professor. Or at least pass an oral exam.

     

    Post a Comment